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1. |
the life i had
03:13
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turn me upside down
& shake my dreams out
of my pockets
i don’t need them now
i’ve got a desk with
my name on it
this pile of paper grows
i’ve never looked at a page
but i don’t get rid of them
just in case
give my body to the city
where i was born
leave it out for
all the citizens
when they’re bored
to look at, & make
what they want
of the life i had
no, i probably didn’t have
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2. |
my own way
03:40
|
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i did a line but i never got pretty
just sort of bloated and a little depressed
i over eat and i watch too many movies
dream up new friends
because my life is pretend
i had a girlfriend but i left her behind now
when my friends ask i still tell them she’s fine
say don’t worry she’ll meet up with us next time
it’s not the truth
but it’s not really a lie
some days i feel like i won’t get any older
i won’t get married
i don’t want any kids
grow up alone and i won’t have people over
won’t watch tv
so i won’t know what i’ll miss
i don’t know why i’m like this
it hasn’t always been this way
my doctor says there’s a medicine to help me
but i’m too fucking stubborn
i’ll just suffer in my own way
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3. |
you looked nice
03:20
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you looked nice
when you said you wanted to go
to that new place on 7th
where your friends went last week
i knew i couldn’t afford it
i think you did too
your eyes were so green
that when you closed them
i could still tell
so i said i would go
you looked nice
sitting at the bar
$7 gin n’ tonic
i ordered club soda with lime
in secret
sipped at it & imagined the vodka
imagined other places i’d rather be
but you looked nice
you looked nice
at the train station
hair curled over your left shoulder
fell asleep mid-conversation
can’t recall what i said
just the weight of your head
on my arm
it felt a crime to shake
you back to life
but you just smiled & asked the time
as though you cared to know
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4. |
one more time
03:14
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there’s a life outside my window
where i used to live
i sit there watching it
while i wonder what it might be like
to taste it
one more time
i go to work in a new world
walk through in old one on the way
there i pass friends & lovers
& even myself
i want to speak to him just
one more time
when i get home in the dark
before everybody else
i sit with razors in my eye
a tear between my fingers
convince myself
i can do this
one more time
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5. |
without you
03:17
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you saved my life
but not in the way
that i would’ve died
without you
you gave me something
to look forward to
when i was only ever
looking back
when i get lost
lost in the night
you’re my north star
my spirit guide
can’t say i buy into all that
all i can say is how you’re
always the brightest
in the room
without even meaning to
shine at all
oh, you showed me how to live
how to stand on my own
led the way & waited patiently
while i stumbled
& i know you’re no angel
i’d probably be just fine without you
but i don’t want to find out
|
the smallest one Calgary, Alberta
my name is mason & i like to write songs about things.
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